Parenting Tips for Capricorn Children

Hey everyone, this is Adam Elenbaas from Nightlight Astrology, and today we are going to continue our series on Parenting Tips for all 12 signs of the Zodiac by looking at Capricorn. So if you have children that are Capricorn Sun, Capricorn Moon, or Capricorn rising, or you want to visit the Capricorn child within yourself because you have one of those placements, you'll probably enjoy this episode.

We've gone through all of the signs of the Capricorn, and what we do in each of these videos is look at five parenting tips that you can use for your kids if they have one of these placements. But broadly speaking, I've seen a lot of people saying this is helpful for me as a Capricorn; I mean, in a way, we're always parenting an inner child, and so that's part of life. I would say that, you know, it could sound like a cliche, like you're your inner child or something like that, but it's true because most of us are still dealing with the way that we were raised and the ramifications that it's had on our behavior and how we were raised may have interacted very positively with those core archetypal traits of our Sun, Moon or rising sign, or it may have not interacted very well with them at all.

A lot of that has to do with the kind of astrological karmic environment that was around us. And the series is not so much about trying to, you know, blame parents or make sure that we get it right and don't mess up our kids, as much as it is about understanding, understanding archetypes so that we can understand ourselves so that we can understand what we need and if you're a parent and you have a child that has these placements, what your kids might need.

I am not a parenting guru or parenting expert. I have two kids; I guess that qualifies me to talk about parenting. But aside from that, I think that my experience of over 13 years of professional practice and working with people who have kids really informs this talk as much as being a parent myself. So anyway, today we're going to look at some tips for Capricorns.

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So there are five parenting tips that I have for Capricorn kids now as someone with a Capricorn moon. I feel like this one was personal and very easy for me to understand. I work really well when I'm talking to parents who have Capricorn kids because I just get it. I get the light and dark side of it, you know, there is that light and dark side for all 12 signs.

This one's gonna be a little provocative because I'm gonna go right for a lot of people who like to hate on Capricorns. Capricorn somehow, like, for example, I've heard it more times than I can count Capricorn is somehow emblematic of the patriarchy, you know, and where that word is uttered, there's usually, you know, there's some anger, right? There's frustration with the way that the world has unfolded with the structures that have been allowed to dictate the way that things go and so forth.

I want to start by saying that in order to understand Capricorn, you have to let go of that association. Consider this. It is a feminine sign, and it is an earth sign and although the combination of Mars and Saturn as the rulers of the sign Saturn, the domicile ruler, and Mars, the exultation ruler, can certainly point to some of the ruthless, domineering, success and ambition-oriented qualities that modern civilization with all of its, you know, in its most F'ed up senses can embody. Really, that's just one little part of Capricorn.

I want to advocate for Capricorn because when a stereotype takes over a sign, it's hurtful, and it's hurtful for all of us because we're robbing ourselves of imaginal and archetypal depth, and life is lived; life is better, just fundamentally better, more meaningful, more interesting, more curious more. The pain is somehow more valuable when we understand the depths of things.

So when you hear people associating Saturn with all of the problems of the world, and, you know, really hating on Saturn or Capricorn, and just giving these blanket statements, you know that you're not in the company of someone who's seeing the sign from the space of real depth. I just want to put that out there first because the same could be said for people who come up with stereotypes about Scorpio, or Virgo, or Leo, or whatever.

So, on that note, the first tip that I have is to support conservative qualities. Now, I want to show you something that I looked up. So, I looked up the etymology of conservative, and I thought that it was interesting that it says, tending to preserve or protect preservative, having the power to keep whole, or safe, to keep preserve, keep intact, or to guard, to keep watch or to maintain; to maintain what is established.

Right, and then you have, so it's really important because when we hear the word conservative, we tend to think about political orientations or religious orientations, and we tend to think, well, you know, generally speaking, being conservative is not such a popular thing, to be liberal or to be open-minded, or to be progressive, or to be future-oriented, or to think in terms of what's possible, and don't protect things in the past but think about new possibilities in the future. These are hallmarks of modernity.

So, we live in a world where when you hear the word conservative, there's not a lot of hospitality towards it; there's a lot of suspicion toward that word. But one of the things that is fantastic about the sign of Capricorn is the way in which it will protect and conserve things; it will protect and conserve, keep intact, or guard things that have value and meaning, and worth.

Now that looks different for every soul. So to have conservative qualities does not mean that we aren't necessarily politically or religiously conservative, and it doesn't mean that you're closed or narrow-minded about the future or about new or different ways of doing things. It simply means that there is a tendency to want to protect, to keep watch over, to guard, to keep intact, to keep whole, something that feels like this is sacred and precious and worth keeping around. So this is a sign that, in some ways, as it embodies conservative qualities, embodies a spirit of protecting and guarding things that have value that you do not want to see destroyed.

When a Capricorn finds something of value, or an activity or a hobby or a subject, or a person that it loves that it finds value, it will do everything it can to keep and maintain that thing to preserve it and protect it. That is one of the most overlooked parts about Capricorn is that Capricorns are safe garters of things that they don't want to see thrown out, discarded, chucked away, et cetera. Now for some Capricorns, that may mean that tradition, traditional values from the past, or religious values passed down in the form of doctrines over 1000s of years are to be safeguarded, preserved, or protected.

But it's not that simple, right? I think this is fun. I'm wearing a Grateful Dead shirt today that I got after my wife, and I decided to go to a Grateful Dead concert this summer. I've been getting into the Grateful Dead with her, which is one of her favorite bands, and I've been learning more about them, and we're going to a concert; we're like, well, we want to get a couple of Grateful Dead T-shirts when we go to the concert.
So I got this one for us, which is the bears are gardening. Kind of perfect since we've been doing a lot of gardening lately.

But here's the thing is that when when when my wife describes, for me, the whole world of the Grateful Dead, that so much of what was going on in that community of Deadheads was protecting and preserving something that had worth. An experience musically that was profound and important to the people who followed it.

Now, I think that itself is super important. There are two signs that have a lot to say about preserving and protecting things. The other one is Cancer, the opposite sign. So I was not surprised to find that Jerry Garcia was born with a bunch of planets in Cancer. Now, I say that not so much because this is a video about Cancer but because this axis, Cancer and Capricorn, have a lot to do with safeguarding and protecting things.

Now, Cancers' way of protecting is usually through a kind of gentle, sweet, devoted maternal protective quality. Capricorn is more like the structures and the physical earth, the things that we move around to safeguard; for example, if you want to protect the legacy of great rock and roll, you build something like The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in Cleveland, Ohio, if you've ever been there, it's a really interesting place.

So in Capricorn, it's a little bit more like you're looking for a way to build something that structurally will support and preserve what is meant to be maintained and protected. For example, when you look at the Cancer-Capricorn axis, you also think about the family as Cancerian, and you think about sometimes the structure of the home, the traditions of the family, whether that's playing Uno after dinner, something we like to do in our house, or that's family meal time or family vacation.

I mean, whatever people do. There are rituals and structures, and traditions that help keep things intact. Capricorn is a builder of those things and a lover of those things, and those are conservative qualities to have to hold and protect with structures. There's nothing wrong with that. Now, what you want to protect, if it's, I don't know, white supremacy, well, then you've got a problem. You know what I mean? If you want to protect us from ever growing or changing and evolving as people and just cling to the past, okay, you have a problem.

Those are shadows, though. That's not, that's not what Capricorn is about; at the heart of what it is, for example, as a Capricorn Moon growing up, one of the things that I loved to do was develop practices, all different kinds of structures to maintain and safeguard the things that I loved. For example, I loved to read, and I loved to write; those were things that I found great joy in, and so I built little structures in my life to always support the ongoing love and connection to those things.

Now remember, I have a Cancer sun, so Cancer sun, Capricorn. So I've had a little bit of both, but I always thought it was interesting that I had all these devotional things that I like to nurture and take care of, but then I also had always built structures to kind of safeguard and conserve those things that I loved and took care of. So that's the Cancer-Capricorn axis. Support, the energetic, conserving, we'll call it that conserving qualities that your children may have. There's nothing wrong with it. Just because they're doing that doesn't make them conservative in some pejorative sense.

Number two support dark, cynical moodiness. This might sound weird. This is the sea goat. This is a sign of Saturn. It's an earthy sign of Saturn, and one of the best parts about this side comes during this, you know, the basic return of the light from within the darkest time of year, and Saturn was the dimmest, most distant planet associated with melancholy.

There's something about hardness, about distance and remoteness about alien or alienation, about somber, melancholic vibrations that live in the sign. But the thing is that the world tends to judge those things. Oh, you're not happy or something like that. But for Capricorn, often these exact dark, cynical, moody, angsty qualities associated mostly with Saturn, a bit edgy too with Mars. These qualities are like they're a trusted friend. Let me put it that way.

There's a great character, and I believe it's Jason Bateman. Yeah, Jason Bateman plays a character in the show Ozark. Well, basically, all of his characters, if you could put it that way, all of his characters are very Capricornian. He has the sun in Capricorn in his chart, and he also has Mars in Scorpio and some other interesting placements that I think go along with to describe some of his characters, but actors often play characters that are emblematic of their birth charts. When there are major traits, and those are like, if you see Robin Williams, like, you know, it's Robin Williams, because it's Robin Williams, you know. So the way that people act in movies will embody their archetypal configurations in the birth chart.

Jason Bateman is a great example of a Capricorn because he has this kind of harsh bottom line cynical, moody, sarcastic quality. It's a little devil, like, it's a little and sort of a little devilish. But why is he so popular? Because a lot of people find that refreshing, relieving, relaxing, enjoyable, and funny because some of us walk around the world with a program that just allows us to see the dark, the death, the remote, the absurdity of life, and your Capricorn kids if they have those themes, don't try to fix them.

Now they're becoming self-destructive in some way, then okay, but don't try to fix those things. We need a little bit of devilish humor, and we need, like the dark nature spirits and sprites, and we need all the little creatures of the night right to have their say, to look at the world through the lens of darkness and the intermingling of shadows and light, and to see the connected things between dark and light, good and evil that a lot of people don't see, to find humor in it, to find irony in it, to have a little bit of a twisted sense of humor, or the way you look at the world is just a little dark.

That keeps it keeps it real. You know, there's something very folky and earthy about that dark, cynical, moody quality. People will say Capricorns they're closed down to emotions, right? Well, depends on what you define as emotional. Capricorn is not a sign that is void of emotion. It's a sign whose emotions run very deep and slow, like deep, slow waters.

It's the sea goat that climbs out of the ocean, right? So this is a spirit in Capricorn. That's actually very moody and emotional, as was Saturn. Saturn was the ruler of Capricorn and the planet associated with melancholy. Just don't forget that.

All right, support, angsty realism, same kind of vibe, that Capricorns will have a way of looking at things, and you'll go off that's just like not very forgiving. You don't want your kids to become bottom-line, Machiavellian, ungraceful, unimaginative, too literal to sort of seeing things in an overly linear way, which could be a shadow, but when your kids have kind of a wicked bottom-line way of seeing things, laugh; it affirms that's smart.

Introduce other possibilities so that rigidity doesn't set in, but always acknowledge that kind of bottom-line angsty realism because, for Capricorn, sharing that with other people is like drawing water from a deep dark well, and there are magical sea creatures that live in that well that come up to the earth and so, just don't be too hard on Capricorns ironically because they're more sensitive than you think.

Number four is support self-care. One thing that's a definite shadow for Capricorn is the tendency to keep plowing ahead in order to get things done or out of being overly workaholic or overly ambitious, or just kind of ruthlessly determined sort of steely again, Machiavellian. This can all be the under like, you know, Capricorns can have a little bit of that devil card. It's like the feeling of getting just driven, you know, by something obsessed; Capricorn can be very obsessive about getting things done or getting climbing a mountain accomplishing something, or becoming very successful and kind of ruthless about it. The thing that tends to get neglected is self-care, and where there is true real self-care, there is usually a need to step away from that plowing forward and that ruthless determination, so number four support self-care.

Number five support emotional intelligence. Capricorns, again, are not unemotional. That is when people say Capricorns are unemotional. I want you to repeat what I'm saying. That is not true. Then you can tell people about what you know about Capricorn. Here's something that you have to remember is that Capricorn, as the sign of Saturn, was, again, associated with melancholy.

Melancholy is one of the most emotional kinds of temperaments that there is; it's emotional; it can get kind of stuck and narrow and rigid about the way that it sees the world, and that can sometimes be a little dark. But just because things are sort of dark and earthy and a little bit dense and thick and heavy, emotionally speaking, does not mean that it is not intelligent.

Now the main thing when we say support emotional intelligence is to support how are you feeling right now. What do you need? In this moment, where are you at? How can you locate yourself in your feelings in your body? Easy to dissociate from the planet like Saturn ruling; melancholy can be extremely dissociative. So how do I feel, letting the wisdom of the body come in because, remember, the moon that rules the body is in its detriment in this sign?

One of the things I've had to learn throughout my life over and over and over again is how do you feel in your body right now? What do you know? What is your body telling you to do? When I was young, and I had a bit of depression, that was when I was susceptible to addictive tendencies and had to eventually pull myself out of opiate addiction, which I've talked to you guys about many times before. I look back at that, and I think that the problem wasn't that I was lacking emotion; it was that I would get fixated and sort of too narrow with the emotion.

Often, that's because of a lack of connection, sometimes a connection to others, where you need to share an intimacy and vulnerability. But also, it started with not being emotionally connected to my own needs. If you turn the cynicism toward yourself, then you're going to be harsh, you're going to be too hard on yourself, like, you know, well, I need a bath, you know, well, what do you know, you know, put some bubble bath in there too, and feel real sorry for yourself.

Capricorn is more likely to speak like that, to itself, so to speak, because it just has that kind of angsty, dark realism. It's suspicious about selfishness. Capricorn is, in many ways, like such a driven practical sign. It's like do what's necessary, kind of like bite a stick and get through it. But that is really useful in terms of not indulging in, like, you know, some Capricorns, anyone can be narcissistic, but you know, it's not a sign that's like, super narcissistic; it tends to be more self-effacing.

So listening, what does my body need? What is my body telling me that's often harder for Capricorns and far more important when it comes to not letting the negative, dark, melancholic state eat away internally, cut you off from other people, and so forth. So, you know, with your kids, it's like, support them, getting to know their needs. The softer underbelly, the soft, you know, oftentimes, Capricorn kids have to grow up quickly for one reason or another. There's a feeling of having to be more mature and disciplined and ready for the world. And you should be at an early age. That's a pretty common thing to happen with Capricorn karma.

But sometimes, we have to go back and say; there's just there's a little kid in there that needs a hug. There's a little kid that needs time and tenderness. Almost like thinking about Cancer a little bit? So how do we bring in that emotional, caring, gentle, sensitive mindfulness? That is a huge ally to Capricorns, and when Capricorns have that, they're not only among the most effective, but they're also among the most caring signs; they'll do anything. They'll work really hard. They also know how to take care of themselves and connect with others.

You have an amazing soul, you have a person that will be of tremendous value and support in your life, and you'll have someone who is strong and capable and also self-loving. So these are my thoughts about Capricorn. I hope that they are useful for you as parents or just listening and thinking about your own inner child, so to speak. Alright, that's it for today. We will see you again tomorrow. Bye, everyone.