Hi, everyone, this is Acyuta-bhava from Nightlight Astrology, and today I'm doing the fifth part of a 10 part series that I've called "10 Things I've Learned in 10 Years of Professional Astrology." So, for those of you who have been following along with this series, you know, probably that this past summer, July of 2020, I had this sudden revelation that I had been doing astrology for 10 years. And I was like, wow, that's pretty cool. So I wanted to reflect on those 10 years, and figured out how many charts I had done during this time. And average, probably have 1000 plus charts a year in all different settings and formats. But I was like, wow, that's a lot of charts over a long period of time. And so I started journaling and sort of reflecting on my experiences over the past 10 years and decided that the insights that I had gained would make for a really fun series. And there's a couple of reasons for doing this series. One would be that it's a really good time to just pause and reflect. And hopefully, some of these insights that I've gained will help others that these insights, you might realise, wow, yeah, those are my insights, too. Sometimes hearing another person, put their reflections upon an experience into words, that helps you crystallise something very similar. I'm also because I know that in this, you know, in reflecting upon astrology, the nature of astrology, that there are insights that are going to form for all of you who are listening, that are very different from my own, but that this may help you stimulate some of those. And I think that that's when astrology is at its best when it is a process. It's a part of our inner process and our inner spiritual life. So in each of these episodes, and please tell me where you're coming from, I'm doing a live cast of this today, obviously. So wherever you guys are coming from, I'd love to hear where you're tuning in from, I see someone from Portland, Oregon. So that's cool.
Anyway, in every one of these episodes, I have had a title for the particular insight. And this being the fifth episode, no exception. The the the insight, if I had to just sort of paraphrase it is it's simpler than you think. It's simpler than you think. And that applies for me as well. So it's simpler than we think. And what do I mean by that? Well, here's the basic idea. I've already said in this series, that people come to an astrology reading, often seeking a way of improving their karma. Or they'll come in and they'll say, there's something that I'm dealing with that I don't like, or that's difficult, and I want to know, how do I improve it? And in an early part of the series, you've heard me say, look, you can't change your karma until you change your consciousness, that's a basic truth. And I elaborated upon that at length in a previous video. So in a sense, I want to stick with that and just say, you know, that's still the truth is that, you know, you're not going to change your karma unless you change your consciousness. And weirdly enough, when you change your consciousness, you know, your karma doesn't matter to you as much. In other words, the good the bad of life, they become, they all become an enrichment opportunities, we start to see the hands and fingerprints of God all over everything we're experiencing. And there's a way in which the good and the bad are seen as equally beneficial to the evolution of the soul. It doesn't mean that we don't suffer It doesn't mean that we have some kind of stoic, unfeeling, neutral, detached or dissociated quality to our consciousness. But it does mean that we, we don't judge as intensely between good and bad experiences that we seem to be in it. And that's what matters. Okay, so I still stick by all of that. But in this episode, what I wanted to talk about was that and improving your karma is also a lot simpler than most people think.
Most people will come to an astrology reading, reasonably wanting to know when some kind of karma in their life is going to turn around or change. And the truth is that our karma changes and turns around all the time and our karma is also flexible and the choices we make matter and can in fact, influence or change our karma for better or worse. So, when I was reflecting on this, I was like, you know, if I think about, if when I think about it, changing your karma, at least, a little bit, or even, you know, somewhat, it is possible to change your karma people do. It all the time. And it's actually a lot simpler to change your karma than people think. So what I want to do is I made a list of the things that people tend to come in, struggling with or suffering, and the most basic, simple advice that I think one could give or take in order to improve their karma in these most asked about areas of a birth chart. So that's what I'm going to talk about.
Now. It is simpler and easier to change our karma than we think it is. And it usually requires very basic, basic practices or changes that we make in our lives. The main thing that makes it difficult to do so is being consistent with these things. So I'll talk about them now each as we go along. So if I had to say the number one thing that people come into an astrology reading, let's say with a complaint about, it's going to be their relationships. So people come into astrology reading, and they say, I want a better relationship, or I don't feel like the relationship I'm in is satisfying enough or problems with relationships, I don't have one and I want one. I've never had a good one. And I want a good one, whatever the case might be. So when it comes to relationship, karma, there's a few things very, very basic, almost like no brainers, there's so these pieces of advice are so simple, that sometimes I think people people go well, it can't be that simple. To make my karma better. It can't be that simple. But it actually is. And I will say that all of the advice that I'm about to give today is not just advice that I've given, it's the kinds of things that I've seen people enact in their life to make them relatively more successful. Do these pieces of advice, solve everything? No, but they do make things better. So if you want a better relationship, and you're single, absolutely prioritise your spiritual life and prioritise being with someone who prioritises their spiritual life, because most relationship problems boil down to the person that I'm with, does not have or share the same spiritual values that I do. It's like 80% - I don't know, it might even be higher than that - of the people that I speak to aren't happy in a relationship primarily because they are prioritising their inner life or their spiritual life, their emotional and internal psychological dimension, and their partner is not. Simple. And so one very simple thing you can do if you're single, is, look, don't settle. But you know, you might meet people who are nice, who are good looking that you have some chemistry with. But the simplest thing you can do is, don't get into a relationship with someone that doesn't share the prioritisation of their spiritual life like you do. That's the most basic advice and stay consistent with it don't compromise, don't get into a relationship with someone who doesn't share that value. That is one of the easiest pieces of advice that I have to give to people that are in general can make your karma in relationships better.
Now, the other side of this, though, is that there are a lot of people who come in to talk with me who are in relationships with people that they love very much, but who don't have a spiritual life, that's trickier. So in that situation, there's a few things that I would recommend. One is that hitting people over the head and trying to make them spiritual, or coerce them, or guilt them, or blame them or judge them, that doesn't work. So don't try to force someone to become someone that they're not. Usually a simpler piece of advice is: just do your thing. Love them, accept them for who they are, don't try to change them. And if it's meant to be that you will come to share that dimension of life together, then you will, it could be that it's your karma to have to be in a relationship where you're spiritual and your partner is not. And that might be something that you have to carry. And so the task might be to just carry it as well as you can. And it's going to be a lot harder if you're judging the person and trying to change them all the time. On the other hand, you know, sometimes it's not just that they aren't spiritual, it's that the that in compatibility of the, of let's say, your own where you're at and where your partner is, that is such that you have to leave the relationship. You know, only you know that in your heart, you know the difference. Sometimes it can be it's as simple as saying like, if you can't change someone, or they're not going to change and you can't live with it, then you might just need to get out of the relationship. And that's really the way to improve the karma. And then there's almost like a third category which is, find common ground with someone that you're with if they don't share your spiritual life. Where else can you find common ground? And can you just live and lead by example, or love the person for who they are and find other ways of sharing with them. But those are generally the things that make the karma better if you're in a relationship with someone else. If you're unhappy, it's often because you're not sharing the same values or prioritisation of the same values. And you either accept the person and find another way of getting along, you come to accept that the person isn't going to change, and you learn to live with that as part of your karma. Or you take it as a sign that it's time to move on. But you have to get clear about which one it is. And that's the advice that I typically give for people who are in relationships and unhappy. Usually, again, it's because there's not that compatibility of sharing in a spiritual relationship with someone. Now, again, most of my clientele are women. So a lot of the people that I see are women who are not with men who are spiritual, and that tends to be at the heart of what they report as their problem, or what have I seen from, you know, women who are in the situation, let's say and dealing with it constructively. It's that they are, you know, again, they're just accepting that this is what it is, they're not trying to change their find other, they're finding other common ground, they're living with it, or they're taking it as a sign to move on. But if you're just sitting there not doing any of those things, and expecting something to change, it's not likely to change, and your discomfort or dissatisfaction isn't likely to change either.
Now, the other truth about getting into a relationship with someone else, if you're single, is, as someone is saying, in the chat box right now, the number one reason I'm single at this point in life getting clear of my own values before engaging with another. That's right, like if you don't go into a relationship with your own sort of spiritual programme running, you know what I mean? That it's less likely that you'll find someone else who has that clarity. And then if you find that clarity, it's a kind of luck of the draw whether or not someone else is going to follow along, and, you know, follow suit. So you have to, in my mind, I would say, really get a strong spiritual core and foundation in your life if you're single, and prioritise, finding someone else who has something similar going on. Now, those are simple truths. But if you any of those truths are taking up, my experience is that the karma improves significantly. Is it perfect? No. And remember what I said in another talk, which is that weeds will keep cropping up. You know, as soon as you feel like you've got it on one area of life, you know, weeds and problems and troubles will crop up in another area. So, don't think that just because you can improve upon any of these things, it means that your happiness lies and trying to master your karma. I've said that a few times in previous episodes, but that's the truth here. But anyway, these are the simple truths around relationships that I've noticed incredibly beneficial, they positively have a big positive impact on your karma and relationships, if you follow any of those simple pieces of advice.
If you want better relationship with money, I can't tell you how many people come in talking about problems with money. This is a simple truth, all of these are so simple. Take some portion of your money, no matter what your income is, and use it in charity or service to others. Invest in a cause that you believe in, that does some good in the world. For you know, for me and my family, we give to our temple community and all the projects that they have, including, you know, eco friendly farms in India and care for women's education in India. And like so there's, and there's lots of other things here domestically, too, that we get involved in, we donate monthly to the NAACP legal defence fund, blah, blah, blah. So take, take some portion of what you make, and put it into the things that you care about that are outside of yourself. There's a way in which using money for selfless service increases your joy in relationship to money. It's simple, because you get joy and happiness when you use your money to support things that are good in the world. So some Karma Yoga, there really helps, even if it's just psychologically, I'm not saying you use this in order to make money. That's not at all what I'm saying. I'm just saying, if you want to see your karma, improve with relationship to money. You know, most people think when I have money, that's when I'll do something good with it. Once I get out of a hole, that's when I'll do something good with it. But what I've seen time and time again, is that money problems keep cropping up throughout life, there always be some degree of anxiety about money, even with people who have a tonne of it. It's unbelievable how much anxiety there is there too. So, you know, just make sure you're using your your money as a form of energy to serve others. It's so simple, but it works. And you have to do it consistently. It can't just be a one time thing. It has to be like every paycheck, just give a little something to something that you really care about. And find something that really fulfils you emotionally to give to.
People ask a lot about health and they say I've been having this difficult health transit or when will this help problem go away or whatever. This is gonna sound so rude. I don't mean to sound patronising at all. But if you want better health karma in your life, take better care of your body. It's really simple. But do a simple inventory guilt free, don't sit there, you know, slapping yourself with a ruler on the wrist or something, just look and say, Where can I get healthier, and then go get healthier in those areas. Just do it and be consistent about it. And you'll find that your health karma improves your relationship to your body, your self image, self esteem, eating, diet, all different kinds of problems in the body, they tend to get better when we spend less time figuring out what's wrong with me, what's wrong with me, how did it get this way? When will it be over? When will the suffering stop? That that mode of thinking isn't nearly as effective, even though that we might need to participate in some diagnostics and figuring some stuff out? It doesn't work nearly as well. In my experience, again, seeing so many people in the yoga setting, in herbal medicine with my wife, in astrology. 10 years of doing this. It doesn't work nearly as well as the people who sit down and go, where can I be healthier? Can I sleep? Can I adjust my sleep pattern a little bit more? Can I eliminate different kinds of toxins from my diet, my food, the substances I take in from my mind my body? What can I exercise more when people think about those things and prioritise them when they're proactive about becoming healthier? questions, concerns and anxieties about health automatically go down and get better. I know that that might sound patronising, because it's so simple, but I don't mean it to come across that way. It just literally is that simple. But it has to be consistent.
People always say I want better family karma. I want. I want karma to be better around home family, parents, ancestry, my kids, blah, blah, blah. Here's a simple one. If you want a better home life, make an altar in your home, at least one room or one bedroom that is dedicated to just prayer, gratitude, thanksgiving, connecting with the cosmos, thanking the ancestors, thanking the natural elements, thanking the saints and avatars that you appreciate, housing the Holy Scriptures that you like to read are the sacred texts or poetry that you enjoy. Keeping your prayer journal in that room, keeping candles lit a little bit of incense going, nice music in that room, have one room in your house that is dedicated to house the holy, right. And it's amazing how you will see most immediate benefits if you turn your home into a sanctuary or turn some small part of your home into a sanctuary. Everything gets better around family and home karma. That one is actually quite powerful in my opinion. I have seen really powerful transformations occur when people do that. So if you want family karma to get better bring more of the Divine into your home and family pray for your family members. Outside of this office here I have a three tiered shelf out in this little like annex area. And there's a whole bunch of bhakti, Christian, bhakti yoga paraphernalia. And then on the bottom, there's this little shrine that I made to our family. And there's pictures of family. And there's candles, and I have a big cast at the centre of the shrine that my wife made when she was pregnant of her belly. And it was like a moulding cast that her and her girlfriends did and then they decorated it. So you've got wife's like an image of mama right right there at the centre of the altar with candles and pictures and things like that and keep candles and incense around there. You have to be very deliberate about the way that you look at, perceive, and almost adore. It's almost like bringing in an element of worship into how you think about your family, your home, your relatives, your ancestors. And if you keep that alive, along with the other totems that you keep on your altar in your home and family, things get better and do it even if you don't like family members, even if there's things to not like, include them in your prayer, include them in a space in your home. That's very sacred. Do this every day. I promise you it's a very, very simple way but very effective way to improve family karma.
So if you want a better relationship with your children, what have I noticed over the years to people who tend to have good relationships with their children, it's a simple, simple truth again, it's like Kahlil Gibran stuff. Your kids aren't yours. The way that they turn out is not a reflection of you or me or our egos. If you want a better relationship with your children, think of them as someone as beings that you are in service to and let go of attachment around how they turn out. Do your best, obviously, we want to do our best but what I've noticed is that the parents who I look up to who are, you know, in my practice, who seem to have cultivated good relationships and stuck with their kids through the hard and difficult patches of relationships and so forth, the parents have this way of saying, you came through me, but you don't belong to me. And I am in service to your growth as a soul. And I see you sort of as on loan to me, you know what I mean? I've just noticed that that simple attitude, and you might have to find a way of tapping into that daily. For me, it's prayer. It's like, every day, before we go to bed at night, we say our prayers together as a family, and in the way that I pray, I'm really sure to voice my sense of service to my daughters, so that they know, hey, I'm here to help you. And you're not mine, you're a being all of your own. That sense of autonomy and detachment from how they turn out. So because that's the thing that I see people suffer from all the time, is that their kids you want, you want to try to shape them or mould them, or you get really attached to how they turn out. And the thing that I've noticed over time is that if you want a better relationship with your kids, and you want that relationship to be really soulful, think of yourself as a servant of that child and let go of wanting them to turn out a certain way, which is very difficult to do. I'm not suggesting it's easy, but that's the practice that I've seen in the most successful parents that come into my practice and the most successful, you know, and how do I see people managing difficult karma with kids, it's like that it's surrendering and keeping in mind, I'm a servant.
People come in to readings, also with a lot of concerns about enemies, I'll just, they don't say I'm concerned about my enemies, you know, because no one likes to admit that that's what we're actually talking about. But people come in, and they'll say, I always have problems or conflicts with people, or there's some drama at work or with coworkers or, you know, basically what it boils down to is people come in, and they want to know how to fix relationship problems that are non romantic or non familial in nature. So if we're talking about relationships outside of the outside of marriage, and family, and troubles in those relationships, what is the simplest thing that you can do to improve your karma when it comes to struggles in those relationships? Well, practice the art of not being judgmental, or critical in thought, and in word. I wear this little wristband that says "Kind words clean heart." And this wristband helps me to do that. Because I'm a pretty like, analytical person, you could say, and it's very easy for me to want to like diagnose and, I like to get into the details and try to figure things out, why are people act to behave the way that they do and stuff like that. But for me one of the quickest ways to disentangle ourselves from webs of relational conflict, the karma of conflict in relationships, is to practice the art of being less judgmental or critical in our thoughts in our mind, and in our words, in our speech, that is a hard one. One task that you can do, if you want to take it up is a rubber band challenge. I did this like, I don't know, a year or two ago, two years ago, I guess. Now, you wear a rubber band on one wrist. And the goal is to go for 21 days without being critical or judgmental or harsh with your words or speech. And when you are critical, you take your rubber band off and shift it to the other wrist and you start over. The goal of this is to get to 21 days without having to switch your bracelet. It took me the first time it took me I think it was like 50 or 60 days to finally get 21 straight days without doing it. I certainly have not maintained that every day, right. But the practice in and of itself, of doing that with a rubber band back and forth is so valuable, because what it's going to teach you to do is that there's times where we have to be critical thinkers, we have to be discerning and discriminating. We have to make careful judgments about things. But this is an exercise that can help you learn to do that without being mean judgmental, harsh or critical. And by critical I don't mean critical thinking I mean, negative divisive speech and judgmental qualities. So if you want fewer problems in relationships in general practice the of not being judgmental, critical gossiping like that in our heads in our in our mind and in our speech, it's very hard to stop in your head. But it's a lot easier to to catch yourself doing it in your mind if you practice catching it in your speech, which is why the rubber band exercise can work so nicely.
So the other thing is if you want fewer enemies, don't compare yourself to other people don't get jealous or envious of other people don't compare your your good qualities or your bad qualities, your your victories or your misfortunes to other people just stay away from comparing yourself to other people, because that's another trap that I see people getting into constantly that leads to problems in relationships. This one's really the to me this is this one is like, very, this is maybe the least complicated advice of all of them. I see people that come in. And they tend to get involved in these really deep in like entanglements with other people complex emotional soul contracts with people, but it's it's heavy, and it's difficult. It's like somehow I owe this person something, or they owe me something. And there's like a kind of a very deep level of entanglement that occurs and it usually doesn't feel good to people, right? I'm not talking I mean, we get entangled with people in ways that are really meaningful, and the intimacy that's formed is great. If you tend to be someone who gets into really deep kind of karmic entanglement with lots of debts and obligations to other people, or that they have to you, where does that come from? And is there any simple way in which you can fix or change that? And the simplest thing that I've noticed is this, don't take credit for things that you didn't do or that don't belong to, or don't take more credit for something than you deserve. I know that's gonna seem really weird. But here's the thing is that when we take more credit for something than we deserve, there's a way in which someone that that we owe something to is getting the short end of the stick. Right. And that is what ends up in tangling us with other people. For example, a simple example of this in the academic world would be not citing your sources, when you act like you're the originator of an idea or a concept, or something like that. And you're not the kind of person who is regularly pointing to the people you've learned and studied from, you are likely to at some point, get accusef of plagiarism or something like that. The same thing is true in a karmic sense, when we are owning, possessing, taking responsibility for things that aren't our own, that don't really belong to us, but we feel entitled to them, then we're oftentimes going to, in the future entangle ourselves with someone else that we owe something to, because we have to pay that back. So the karma works in that way. And it's the simplest way of not getting really deeply entangled with other people where there's like, you owe me something, or I owe you something. And like that, is to be very careful about taking credit for things, taking ownership of things, or being possessive of things. You know, the view that we should take is nothing really belongs to me, it's on loan, anything good that I have probably came from someone else who's, you know, better than me, or more fortunate than me, or my teachers taught it to me or, I was fortunate enough to have good influences in my life, or give all credit, praise, respect to others all the time and be humble, because that's the easiest way to stay, you know, almost like to not get into really sticky dynamics where that sense of propriety, and you owe me something, you took something, give me something back. That's one of the simplest ways to steer clear of that. The other thing is, of course, in the other direction, practice forgiveness, mercy and tolerance. When someone takes something from you, when someone copies something from you. I remember, you know, as a kid in junior high schools, you know, someone would copy your hairstyle or someone you'd copy someone else's clothing style or something like that. You know, when someone takes something from you that you feel like belongs to you that you like, Hey, that was mine. Practice the same thing. Well, it wasn't mine, really. And even if they did take something from me that it feels like it belongs to me. I'm going to practice forgiveness, mercy, patience and tolerance, because in the long run, that is what keeps us clear of perpetuating these really deep, sticky webs of karma with other people. That's the simple thing that I've learned about that one, if you want to.
A lot of people come in with the desire to learn and grow and expand their mind and their consciousness. I want to learn, I want to grow, I want to understand, I'm a seeker. And we have to ask the question, like, how can you actually find what you're looking for? Is there a simple way? In other words, to, I guess you wouldn't say really improve your karma. But people often come into astrology reading, saying, you know, I'm a seeker and I feel like I'm looking for my truth, or my path, or my, my teachers, or, you know, like, a spiritual community, like I'm seeking to understand, and I'm seeking to grow and learn. And, you know, like, Where do I find that? When does it come? How do I get there? Well, first of all, you know, knocking on the door, and asking the question, and being persistent and relentless in, in that pursuit in and of itself works. Just stay consistent in the desire to know and expand your understanding and grow. How do you grow spiritually? How do you learn more, just keep wanting to learn more keep wanting to know, keep wanting to grow, and that is the simplest way to grow.
But there is this other teaching. And I find that this one is particularly difficult for like Western audiences, it's much easier in my experience for my Indian clients, for example, or the people that I've met in India, when I was at Indian astrology conference in Calcutta a few years ago. It's just, it's much more basic in other parts of the world, even in the Amazon, with shamans. And that's this, that if you really want to learn and understand, and you have to find quality teachers that you personally really deeply admire or resonate with. And then you have to be humble, respectful, and submissive. Now, that part, that last part, especially the word submissive, really freaks people out. Because people hear that word and they go, I'm not going to have someone else with their foot on my head, you know what I mean. And that's not what we mean by submissive. So let me try to unpack this one a little bit, because I too, struggle with this word, but have learned a lot about it. Especially through participating in a in a disciplic lineage and having a guru, myself and so forth. I'm not talking about gurus, either, I'm just talking about any kind of teacher, let me use the example of someone who wants to learn carpentry. So let's say someone wants to become a carpenter. And they're like, I have a little bit of knowledge. And I'm very eager. And I think I can do a great job of this. And so but I need a teacher. Well, for most things in life, whether it's a discipline, a craft a trade, a subject, in school, or even spiritual life, you need to find people who know more than you do, and who are, you know, who are more experienced than you are? It's very hard for the ego to in a sense, it's like, if you want to grow, your ego has to be able to say that, yeah, there's going to be people who know more than I do about something. And what you have to do is you have to find teachers, where your ego is comfortable, in sort of saying, alright, look, I'm going to submit myself and open myself up to receive. And I found that people in the West have a really, really hard time with that. Because when we think about the respect and submission and receptivity required of a student in relation to a teacher, most of the time when we think about our abuses of power that have happened, that may have harmed us or other people that we know this because teachers can abuse power. There is a power differential sometimes in that student teacher dynamic, that potentially can be really harmful. But but it's also not a good idea to say, well, because of that, I'm just going to be self taught, I'm going to learn everything on my own, I have no need for teachers, or something like that. So the way that I've dealt with this, and the way that I've seen people deal with it that is most effective is to say, if I'm going to grow and learn, I need to find teachers. Now, is a teacher a perfect human being. No, they aren't. A teacher is not a perfect being, is a teacher flawless. No. Am I going to agree with every single thing that a teacher does or says? No. Do I have to drink the drink the Kool Aid and throw away my own judgement, my own value? Do I have to place myself below someone else in some kind of power or hierarchical structure of value? No. Right. So those are the myths that we have sometimes in our head about teachers that, you know, we have to place ourselves below them in terms of our worth, or value as a human being. And that's just, of course, anyone should sort of resist that. But what I've also seen is the people who are the most effective when it comes to learning something and eventually becoming teachers themselves, are people who found not just one teacher, but often multiple Teachers who they respect, who they can open their heart, their mind to receive from in a respectful manner that doesn't engage the ego in a contest of any kind. People who are too proud to do that, generally speaking, don't learn, don't grow and are not consistent in what they do or aren't that great of teachers themselves. So if you want to be a teacher, in other words, you have to learn how to be a student. And that's just something that I've seen for people, whether they're, again, whether they're wanting to get good at something, like dance, or whether they're thinking about, you know, finding a spiritual teacher, or, or a path of some kind, there's a sense in which, if you really want to grow and learn, you have to be able to humble your ego to receive from someone. And simultaneously, you have to hold the perspective that just because I'm being in a submissive, respectful position to a teacher, doesn't mean I'm degrading or demeaning myself, doesn't mean I lack self respect, doesn't mean I have to get into a power struggle with someone and it doesn't mean that the person teaching me is perfect.
If we can hold those things simultaneously, the ability to receive really deeply from teachers and to improve and develop skills and abilities that we want, they come really basically, they come, they come really, really simply, more simply than people think. So for example, in my own life, you know, and I'm not speaking now about my guru, and the community of gurus that I have in the bhakti yoga community, because that's almost like a whole different topic. But if I just think about my astrology teachers, they've been human beings with flaws, and faults, who have not been perfect, but and who have not agreed with on every single thing. But I have been able to sit and be their students and not challenged them and not be disrespectful, not get into a power of wills about the things that I disagree with, and not chuck them out, because they have imperfections. We have this tendency to put people up on pedestals and then knock them off from it or to to, because we are afraid of falling into that pattern of putting someone up on a pedestal and then then falling off from it. We say, well, there's no such thing as teachers, everyone's completely equal. Well, no, everyone's not completely equal. You don't, you know, not everyone can equally teach you the art of brain surgery, right? Not everyone can equally teach you the art of, I don't know, jazz dance or something like that. So we have to be able to recognise that we have to be open to receiving knowledge from people who have it and submitting and opening ourselves and being humble and receptive to our teachers while also not like deifying them. And if you can do that, though, if you can be if you can be in find that position, learning happens really, really, really quickly. It's the simplest way that I've seen people who want to acquire some sort of knowledge or skill set to being successful. So hopefully, that makes sense. I know, it's a tricky one to talk about. Because I certainly don't want to come across like someone who's saying, just go get on your knees in front of a teacher. That's not it. But there is a way in which if you don't know how to get on your knees, in any position in life, it's really hard to receive things that will make you you know, really improve and develop the skills and abilities that you want. So how do you take that posture without confusing yourself worth for being in that kind of humble position? Same thing in yoga classrooms. You know, I've seen people who come in and they treat they treat their yoga teachers like their, you know, their gurus, and it's like, Oh, dude, this person has a family and kids and a marriage that's challenged. And you know what I mean? Be the student when you're on the mat. It's just, it's a posture that you take relative to the teacher so that you can get the best out of the experience, but you don't have to, you know, you don't have to put them up on a pedestal to do that, necessarily.
If you want to find what you love, if you're someone who's saying to yourself, this is probably next to relationships, this might actually be the second biggest thing that people say to me when they come in for reading, which is that I don't feel like I'm doing what I love. Like, what do you mean? Well, I'm at my career sucks, or I don't, I'm doing kind of what I'm doing is okay, I feel like it's utilising some of my skills. But there's another big part of me that feels left out. And when people have this dilemma, they're always saying, when will it change? Or How can I change it? The simple response here is that when you're not working, when you're not in that job, or in that activity, or daily routine, that constitutes doing things that you're not totally crazy about. There's two practices to adopt to graduate Improve that karma. And if it's going to change these practices can do nothing but help, not guarantee that it will, but if the karma is going to change for you do to these two things. Don't trash talk, what you're currently doing, don't hate on, or judge or show bitterness toward the thing that you're currently involved with. Show gratitude, and thankfulness that it's not worse, show gratitude that you have what you have. In other words, just stay in a thankful space for what is. Amplifying your sense of dissatisfaction with what you're currently doing is not going to help, generally speaking. So if you stay in a space of like, it could be worse, I'm grateful for what I have, am I crazy about what I'm doing? No, I'm not going to be in denial about it, but I'm choosing to stay in a place of gratitude for what is. And then outside of that, don't be lazy. The second thing that you have to do is you have to practice doing things that you love. Meaning when you're not working at the place that you don't like, or when you're not doing the things that you have to do that you don't really love doing, do things that you like doing. In other words, don't waste your time. You know, the people that I've seen make really positive shifts in their life for the people who are like, okay, yeah, I'm working a nine to five that I don't like, but in the evenings, and on the weekends, I am completely immersed in the things that I do like, because if you're not clarifying for yourself, what you do like, and you're only sitting there complaining about what you don't like, things are not likely to change. If you are sitting there, you know, on the other hand, if you're going like, I don't love this, but I'm grateful for it. And in the meantime, I am cultivating the heck out of the things that I really do like outside of my obligations, the likelihood is that that will lead you where you want to go in time. Now, is it a guarantee that that will change everything for you? No, but it will make your relationship to what you're doing better.
People often complain about not having groups of people or community, I don't have a community, I don't have friends. I don't know, who am I? Where am I? people, people say, Where are my tribe, but really don't like that phrase. But whatever. People say, Where am I people? Well, oftentimes, what I've noticed is that the people who suffer the most in terms of social disconnect, like art, I don't have good friends, or I'm always disappointed by groups of people or communities, colleagues, religious or spiritual groups of people, I don't know, whatever the case might be any social setting. And the people who experience discontent the most are the ones who have the most unrealistic expectations, which means people who expect my social life or my social circle to save me to be everything, and to be sort of perfect or flawless. It's the same thing that I see from people who tend to have a lot of problems with, for example, teachers, or religion in general, there's not religion, let's not say religion, because sometimes people would think institutions, but let's just say spirituality in a broader sense, there's some expectation that a group of friends, even marriages, a spiritual environment, that it'd be perfect, that it not disappoint that it not have any flaws, that it somehow be above all of that. And I've noticed, the first thing is that if you have that expectation, you're setting yourself up to be disappointed. And you'll start continuing in a vicious cycle where you're unable to be fulfilled in any kind of meaningful an environment that should be a meaningful place of connection for you. So be very careful about your expectations of what other people and communities of people can be because we're all human, and we're all flawed. And again, that probably the number one thing you have to do is say there is no group there is no people or you know, there's no, my life is never going to turn into like the Friends TV series where you know, we're all like best buddies and everything is, you know, totally amazing. Just human beings just are inconsistent and we struggle, we go through ups and downs, we're very imperfect, we hurt each other. So we have to be really realistic about that if we're going to find more meaningful social interactions that don't really disappoint us. And we don't get into that loop of constantly feeling disappointed. Some people you know, you don't need to necessarily find communities, some people are going to be fine with having less of that being more solo, that's fine too. Nothing against that. I have a number of different communities in my life that I love, but, you know, I'm probably generally more comfortable by myself. That's just how I am. You know, my wife's probably pretty much the opposite. She can be by herself. It's not like she can't, but she loves you know, being with people. So I don't know. But the other thing so remember that people are imperfect and then remember this One of the things that I have noticed as a defining feature of, of people who have successful community spaces in their life are the people that prioritise kindness, love and generosity of heart. Meaning if you if you look for people who are kind, affectionate, generous, forgiving, nice people, right? That those regardless of where that community is, if that's the priorities that the people I'm around, are good spirited, like kindred spirits who care about kindness, love generosity, like that, that that you're going to be way happier than if your priority is to find people who are successful, who are connected, who are going to help you be successful in your ambitions, who are concerned about being right. So if you prioritise people who are kind over people who love to be right, you could prioritise people who are affectionate, sweet and generous over people who are powerful, successful and well connected. It's very simple, but like, if you prioritise the quality of connection, heart to heart, from the people that you want to be around, you will generally notice that the karma is much better than if you are looking for people who can somehow in advance an agenda that you have. And it's subtle. It's a subtle thing. But watch for that, because that's, yeah, that's it's a subtle part of what ends up creating really difficult karma when it comes to our social experiences.
Last but not least, I see people who come in, and will often have just a general experience of saying, like, I just feel like I'm going through one thing after another. It's just like one thing after another, how do I make it stop? And and when will it get better? Like when will my life not be so stressful? Overall, that one is hard, right? Because there's sometimes the getting down to the roots of what might be causing someone to feel like they're always going through trauma, after trauma or difficult situation after a difficult situation is not easy. So the general advice that I have is, at that point, if you have not already established a daily spiritual practice, because I must sound just like, you know, I'm like a broken record, but prioritise a daily spiritual practice, because the cultivation of a stable centre is the thing that is most necessary for riding out the ups and downs of life and not feeling like, when are they going to end or you know how to like, when am I going to stop being tortured, or whatever. The simplest way to create a feeling that life is okay and not just a series of stressors, one after the next is to develop and cultivate inner steadiness. When you do that, it's not that the ups and downs go away completely, it's that rather than being so high, and so low, the highs and lows come closer to the middle. And oftentimes, that is more of the problem than the highs and lows themselves is that we're getting thrown around by them and we need inner steadiness. I can't you know, social media, if I had to say, what is the most repeated thing about astrology and social media? It's like, Oh, my God. 2020. This has been the most crazy difficult, like, you know, year, it's like, the cosmos is just saying F you, and blah, blah, blah. No, it's not. You know what I mean? Like, it's, it's been a difficult year, for sure. It's, you know, maybe comparatively more difficult than some other years. But, um, you know, people would say that about 2020, 2019, 2018, every year since I've been an astrologer, that is the exact same response that I see people have. In fact, if I were to say, what is the most common response that I see in my monthly horoscopes every month for years, it would be Oh, my God, everything's been so crazy lately. Well, what is that? Well, that response is the evidence of a culture that is, you know, riding a roller coaster all the time of extreme responses, and not only is it an extreme response, but we also love exaggeration and hyperbole. It's like we can't figure out how to communicate in a way that is a little bit clearer and less exaggerated. Just simple. If you speak from a place that's simple and less exaggerated. In fact, there was an article someone I might have been a joke, but someone was saying that the studies have shown that millennials don't appreciate if you issue a simple sentence with a hard punctuation mark at the end. And I thought, well, that's that's funny, because I don't know if that's true or not no offence to any millennials, but you know, just that that idea that we can't just speak simply and directly and clearly about things, that it always has to be this epic experience and Oh my god and you can tell that things are losing a quality of simplicity and truth, when we have to say, "literally" behind every single thing that we say it was literally it was literally like that, you know, people always saying that. And when people are using those kinds of words, you know that literally, it's probably not that literal. That's the irony. So watch for exaggeration and speech watch for exaggeration and how you respond to things, because the culture of exaggerated responses to astrology itself is an evidence of a culture that does not doesn't value having a steady heart centre to live from. We have to value that if we're not going to if we're not going to be tossed around by these things and relate to astrology only in this kind of constant alarmist, you know, rollercoaster ride.
Okay, so that is what I wanted to share today. I hope that this has been valuable for all of you. I will look up through some of the comments now before ending this and see if there's any questions. In the meantime, as I'm scrolling through this, I should remind all of you my new class Ancient Astrology for the Modern Mystic starts on November 14, it's a year long class, there are 30 classes on the year two to three hours each. They're all recorded. So you can participate in the live webinars or watch them at your own pace in your own time. There's an optional certification test at the end. We're learning ancient astrology, the ancient techniques of Hellenistic astrology and putting them into practice with live clients eventually, and breaking down those sessions teaching you how to read charts. We also have 12 guest lectures for 42 classes on the year plus breakout study sessions for people who want them. One of my TAs leads them. And then we also have you know, forum discussions, you can be in contact with me throughout the year to ask questions about what you're studying, guided reading exercises throughout the year from textbooks, bonus material, optional quizzes, tonnes of really good stuff. So if you're interested, check it out on my website, nightlightastrology.com, the need based tuition is in effect. And if you're struggling, especially due to COVID, you can take advantage of that. Early Bird rates there you can save $500 off you pay up front, there's a payment plan if you need it. So yeah, that's the spiel. I'm advertising for plugging it in every episodes. You've heard me say this 10 times already. Thank you for for, you know, listening.
Alright, let's see what people have got here. First time I've caught you live very much looking forward to studying with you come November. Hey, thanks, Jade. That'll be fun to have you in class.
Nikki says "the number one reason I'm single at this point in my life getting clear of my own values before?" Yes.
Crystaline Crow says that she's in the class that started this summer and loves it. That's awesome.
"I don't give money regularly, but it's a good idea. I give other things though. massages, coaching and reading for free." Yeah, anything that you can give charitably, I think is a good practice when it comes to improving that that karma in general.
Let's see. "It's more meaningful than money you're giving yourself relating to others transferring many other things?" Well, I don't know that it's more meaningful than giving money, because I've had a lot of people in 10 years offer me trades for things. And I don't find that they are generally as meaningful or as valuable as money because everyone values things very differently. So while I value the intention of wanting to give me something, it's valuable to someone, if it's something that they really value. That's the point which, in a sense, money can, is a little bit easier in that regard, because people can use it toward what they value. So I think you have to be careful with the trade thing. Because if the person if you have something that someone else could really use and value that I think it's great. I just think that there you have to be a little bit you have to be careful because some people also will not take good not take good care of themselves and not. Sometimes people who don't, who aren't very good with money will just try to trade things all the time. That's what I'm trying to say. And I'm not suggesting that you know, your your worth in the world is tantamount to how much money you have or anything like that. But you do have to be careful with people who kind of will try to trade as a way of getting around taking more responsibility for themselves than they should. And that's something that I've noticed, by virtue also of owning a yoga studio for 10 years that was based on donations. And we would say, you know, donate $1 donate five bucks, and people would be like, Well, can I can I just, you know, give you this old tea bag that I just drank out of, you could still get another cup of tea out of it or something like that. You know what I mean? It's kind of like, Oh, come on, you know. Anyway.
A question about praying for other people. "How does intercession work? How does God hear it? What about lonely people who nobody prays for? How do we find strength to honestly pray for enemies?" Well, those are good questions. Susanna, I would recommend that you email those to me email@example.com because they make really good questions for my Bhakti channel. For those of you who don't know about it, I have a private bhakti yoga channel on my website, if you go to my website, nightlight astrology.com, you can sign up for it for free. And I go a lot more in depth with questions about Bhakti prayer, all these kinds of questions, I think that would probably make for better response there. A few brief answers: The way that we think of intercessory prayer in bhakti, there's nothing that God isn't already aware of, in terms of the needs, hurts wants of other people. It's not that my praying makes anything happen necessarily. I am then I'm participating in the healing process, and that healing process heals me and connects me with the soul of God in the world and, and others in ways that I don't, can't fully understand. But it's important to do that because our spiritual work is not to exist in a vacuum. Intercession is the work of God in the universe. That's what it is. So we want to participate in that. And so we we pray that way to participate in that. And it's not that nobody's praying for lonely people, all prayers ever are for everyone. You know what I mean? So, but that's, those are very deep questions. And I think I could unpack them for you better in a Bhakti video, send those to me, and we'll see if I can do more. And oh, the last part, you said, How do we find strength to honestly pray for our enemies? You don't until you're doing it. Just sit down and do it. Don't look for the strength to do it. Just do it. And when you're doing it, you have found the strength. Right? You just sit down and you say, Here are my enemies. Here's the people I don't like that I consider to be doing something really bad. Make a list. Sit down and pray for them. And don't do it in a condescending way. Oh, please bless these poor f ups. You know what I mean? Really think of them like people that need your care, concern, empathy and compassion. That's a great if you want to improve your personal karma at all, you know in any direction, pray for your enemies, you know daily or at least try to pray even just once a week, take a serious amount of time. 10 minutes that's what I mean by serious 5-10 minutes. Seriously, sit down and pray for your enemies. It's a really really good practice to have. I can't tell you how much that that's helped me personally. Especially when our enemies in this day and age have so much to do with this sense of otherness oh they're on that side of the political spectrum and compared to mine or oh they believe this and I believe that. That's an easy way to you know, improve your your own health and sanity.
"Do you as your cap moon consider yourself a melancholic?" I don't because I'm my Ascendant ruler is Venus in Leo. And I was also born under a Full Moon opposite the sun in Cancer with Mercury in Cancer. So I definitely have that darker Saturnian melancholic side but it's balanced pretty well by by a pretty cheerful like upbeat disposition. So I have I think I have pretty good balance between them. I have a melancholic side that visits once in a while, but It hasn't been as strong, as for some people.
"Do like nature more or planets?" The planets are nature. They're part of nature.
"I was wondering how to approach and astrological reading as a client, what would be good questions to ask?" Great. Yeah, that's a great question. So I tell people, ask questions about understanding patterns in your life are the things that you really struggle with. Be really clear eyed about what are your struggles, you and ask the astrologer to show you where they exist in your chart. And if they have any advice for how to make improvements upon them, very basic, simple thing to do. Ask the astrologer what they see that they think will be the most important transits or experiences. You know, in the next couple of years. Ask astrologers, which transits they see at the current time or in the past that they think will be most important. Ask questions about, say that you're trying to make sense of where you want to more deeply understand something from your past, pick up the dates and times in your past that you want an astrologer to look at with you and help you understand. But usually, it's like approach it from the standpoint of wanting to understand something. And rather than, like, let's say, the worst thing you could do, in my opinion, is to go in being like, you know, when am I going to get something that I want? Approach with a desire to understand something and be specific about what you want to understand past present or future or throughout your whole life some pattern. I think that good astrologers should be able to help with that. That's kind of when astrology is at its best.
Okay, well, that's what I've got for you for today. It's about an hour, which is what I wanted to I want to hopefully end this by an hour in. So thank you all for listening. I hope you have a fantastic week and we'll see you again tomorrow. Take it easy. Bye.